Surely you, as a guest, want to wish the bride and groom something special. You can take advantage of this collection of funny wedding messages for newly married couple, like a cheat sheet! Make your greetings humorous and concise! Let your speech be a pleasant highlight in the entertainment program of the wedding event.
Funny wedding messages for newly married couple
Marriage is a risk. But in your case, I can state with full confidence that this risk will turn into absolute happiness.
I wish you, my dear ones, to live without troubles for more than a hundred years, and even when you are old, do not lose your spirit of excitement, trembling feelings and romance in a relationship.
Live like happy birds, flying high in dreams and happiness, and may you soon have wonderful chicks.
Congratulations, now you are ringed. I wish to bring these handcuffs of marriage to the end of your days and keep a sincere smile on your face, not a twitching eye, well-being, and not a mental disorder.
Everything is coming to an end. And you, newlyweds, have now ended lonely nights. All this will now turn into nights with your loved one nearby, daily dates and visits of friends who gathered today with all their heart to congratulate you on your marriage!
You have ringed each other, so be kind, cherish each other, delight each other with kisses, hugs, tenderness and pleasantness. I wish you complete happiness and huge sums of money.
So you put an end to bachelor life. With all my heart I wish wife not to be slippery, like a fish and a screeching saw, and I wish husband not to knock, like a woodpecker and not be a clown fish.
Well, congratulations to you, my dears. I wish not to edify each other’s horns, to conquer any enemy together, to smash any problem of reality to smithereens.
Funny marriage greetings for newlyweds
I wish to dive headlong into the whirlpool of love, immerse yourself in the agony of passion, distracting from everyday life, and, of course, always stay in love with the lucky ones.
Happy birthday to a new cell in society. I want to wish you a fun life, like Tom and Jerry, with incredible adventures, like in the animated film “Well, Wait a minute,” with great love and understanding, like modern Masha and the Bear.
May you never forget water and fertilize your love daily, carefully cultivate your happiness and collect its juicy fruits every day.
I wish you, newlyweds, immortal and restless love for a hundred, or even more, years.
Congratulations on the day of the creation of the marriage, with a great celebration in honor of the birth of a new evidence in our bee swarm.
I wish you to be a cool couple, in love, like d’Artagnan and Constance, as faithful as Master and Margarita, as dreamy as Assol and Gray, happy as Cinderella and Prince.
I want to wish you to live a hundred years in a joint marriage, not peck at each other, but protect, do not get tired of playing in bed and keep up with everything.
I wish you always, and even after 100 years, to remain in love with each other, like Romeo and Juliet, and also to remain cool guys like Bonnie and Clyde.
I wish that the carrot never let the groom-hare go, that the rabbit bride’s ears curled up with constant compliments, that there were more than just cabbages on your table, and money was always in your wallet.
I congratulate you on the seals in the documents, with the beginning of the history of your family empire. I wish you both always shone with happiness, as if rings shine on your fingers.
Humorous wedding wishes
I wish you had no spoilage in your marriage! Let your family live in prosperity, let it be a good way during the day, and burning passion at night.
I wish that the husband will always be ready to get the moon from heaven for the faithful wife and fork out for her every whim, and the wife will cook rich borscht, quickly fed her husband and raise children.
Our beautiful bride is beautiful, like Snow White, hardworking, like Cinderella. On her life’s path met 33 heroes, but she fell in love with only one – the beautiful Prince. We would like to wish your whole married life to resemble a fairy tale!
Today we have in our program: eat – to the dump, drink – to the general fun, dance – until you drop. And you need to laugh, joke, accept congratulations and gifts. Now you must always be happy, lucky and love each other!
You will not be bored anymore – meet a new relative. A new mother-in-law will teach you life, her son – patience, her husband will tell about his favorite football team. But the most important novelty will haunt you around the clock. This is your wife!
We wish you to have two bowls in the house: one is full, the second is empty. In full let there be love, health, mutual understanding. And in the empty – pain, misfortune, and other negative factors. Take care of both bowls and set them away from each other.
From this moment, the husband must learn to avoid conflicts, not cause tantrums, give gifts in a timely manner. A wife must learn to look attractive around the clock for her husband! Good luck, guys!
Now your life will be like a war. First, you’ll have to fight with the desire to walk longer with friends, then with socks in the corners, and then with the spouse’s not always joyful mood. We wish to always fight on the side of each other!
We wish you life as in a resort: bask in the rays of spiritual warmth, easy go with the flow in a boat of love. Together, hand in hand, climb the career ladder and enjoy watching your kids play next to you.
Let a cloud of happiness come to your home, and send you the rain of love and prosperity. May passion be lightning to you. Just don’t forget about us later.
I wish I rather forget about the tram ride – let your car be better! Oh, probably not about that … Of course, health, happiness and love in your home!
I wish you more money! Perhaps material wealth is not the most important thing! But you must admit, money solves many other problems! So, unite in one friendly team, and go up to your dreams without looking back.
Together – the main word at the wedding. We wish to live together in a luxury estate. Together to raise children. Together be happy and love each other.
I wish you to have something that cannot be bought for money! Happiness, love and understanding are the foundation of the family. And work on it. And everything else will come to you by itself!
Congratulations, newlyweds! Today you received a marriage certificate, so let it become an incentive for you to have a perfect relationship. Remember that there are supervisory authorities, that is, we, which every year will visit you exactly on this date with a check.
Newlyweds, today you, drunk with love for each other, voluntarily deprived yourself of your freedom. Therefore, I want to wish you that you will never sober up and your feelings remain as strong as they are now!
Congratulations on your revolutionary step in life! I wish you successful restructuring and accelerated growth of your family. Rather, move to self-financing, and your parents will be your reliable sponsors.
Congratulations on your legal marriage! We are compelled to warn that as of today, the acceptance of applications for divorce has been terminated. Oops, now you have to live happily ever after!
I wish you family harmony: let the husband remember that the wife is always right, and the wife has no doubts that she has turned the head of the family in the right direction!
Newlyweds, remember! Scattered socks and unwashed dishes can always be disguised with a passionate kiss of love. After all, marriage is a union of two understanding lucky ones.
The family is a small planet in the universe of life. Protect it from the rubbish of resentments and omissions. May it flourish and shine with your love and peace.
Dear newlyweds! Let the Pole Star of your love lead you through the stormy sea of family life to the deep harbor of happiness! Always shine together!
Dear newlyweds, from this day on you will have a “black” streak in your life. Now you will have a rest on the Black Sea, drive a black Mercedes and eat black caviar with spoons.
An important family time has come for you – a time when it’s not a pity for the closest person to give your life … But it’s a pity to share the last piece of chocolate and sweet cake.
I do not want to rant right now. I hope you made this important decision by weighing the pros and cons. I want to believe that you are a unique couple who will be together for the rest of your life.
So your bachelor life has ended. I wonder how quickly you get tired of each other’s presence? I bet that this will not happen! I believe in you guys!
How long have I been waiting for this event! Finally, I can congratulate you, and give you my advice! Guys, be wiser! Do not quarrel over trifles! After all, we ourselves are building our own destiny! Therefore, it is in your power to make it what you dreamed of.
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