Marriage is a mutual desire of two loving people to formalize their relationship. And despite the fact that there are many wonderful moments in the relationship between husband and wife, trouble also happens. The main thing is to be able to cope with them correctly. We are convinced that if you add a little humor and laughter to your daily life, then quarrels will not arise as often as before. Below you can find a collection of funny quotes about marriage! Read, laugh and love each other!
Funny quotes about marriage
I am a master in my house, and my wife is the only decision-maker.
It is not enough to be husband and wife, you also have to become friends and lovers, so that you do not have to look for them on the side.
My wife and I have been happy for twenty years. And then we met.
In America, eighty percent of married men cheat on their wives. The remaining twenty are cheating on them in Europe.
Marriage is like putting your hand in a bag of snakes and hoping you can get the eel out.
The secret to a successful marriage is not to be home too often.
Get married. If you find a good wife, you will be happy; if not, you will become a philosopher.
A husband who wants a happy marriage needs to learn how to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open.
Funny sayings about marriage
When a man opens the door of a car to his wife, it is either a new car or a new wife.
When a girl gets married, she changes the attention of many men to the inattention of one.
After marriage, the husband and wife become two sides of the same coin. They cannot stand against each other, but still they remain together.
Marriage allows a man to understand in a couple of months that there are very good women, and there are those like his wife.
Women hope that the man will change after marriage, but they do not. Men hope that women will not change, but they do.
A happy marriage is one in which each spouse gives the other the opportunity to be right, although he does not believe in it.
Each marriage, as a rule, consists of an aristocrat and a peasant.
Marriage is a union of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays, and the other never forgets about them.
The best way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once.
Marriage has no guarantees. If this is what you are looking for, go live with recently purchased appliances.
Marriage is a legal or religious ceremony by which two people solemnly swear that they will persecute and spy on each other until death do them part.
A successful marriage requires falling in love many times and always in the same person.
Funny thoughts about marriage
The main harm of marriage is that it corrodes egoism from a person. And people who are unselfish are colorless, they lose their individuality.
Marriage is the main cause of divorces.
All people are born free and equal in rights, but some later marry.
Of course, your husband has his flaws! If he were a saint, he would never marry you.
In marital fidelity there is a little laziness, a little fear, a little calculation, a little fatigue, a little passivity, and sometimes even a little fidelity.
Marriage is an attempt to create something lasting and durable from a random episode.
The best way to preserve a man’s love is not to marry him.
After several years of marriage, a man can look at a woman and not see her, and a woman can see through a man without even looking at him.
In a good marriage, people always teach each other the science of life. Touching daily, lying on the same pillow, you influence each other against your will.
Marriage is when you can afford a wife, when she wants it, and you no longer have the right to allow anyone.
Marriage allows you to once and for all understand who is still to blame for the fact that you ruined your life.
Marriage is always a risk, or a princess will turn into a frog, or a prince into a goat.
Marriage is a union of people of equal imagination. It is strong until one of them begins to imagine himself the king to whom everyone owes.
In marriage, a man gains an invaluable experience in family life, which, if he were single, he would never have been useful.
The first marriage is often unsuccessful because the woman is in a hurry to enter into it, and she is in a hurry because she wants to have time to enter into the second marriage if the first is unsuccessful.
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